This week I had the pleasure of having Mojca Henigman, Mindset Coach and NLP practitioner on Life Strategies With Nat for the Entrepreneurial Woman – Episode 28 – this week.
We talked about a range of things that you can do to help you find your courage from vulnerability to self-care to imposter syndrome. So, let me take a moment to capture it all.
How do you find your courage?
Courage is something we all have but for one reason or another, some of us can seem to find it easier than others, or so we think.
So what is it that makes one person more courageous than the other? Or is the question rather, what makes a person more vulnerable?
Be Vulnerable
This is the first strategy we’re going to discuss…
What is the first thought as you read the quote below. I’ll tell you right now, for me, it was truth staring me in the face.
Let me just say, if you have not watched Brené Brown: The Call to Courage on Netflix – I highly recommend it.
I used to be petrified of public speaking. I would try to do things to overcome the fear but I couldn’t shake that feeling of ‘Get me out of here! Who wants to listen to me up here anyway? What am I even doing here? Is it over yet?!’
Those were literally the sequence of thoughts that I had. I had done workshops, read books, and thought the countless MBA presentations would cure me, but no.
I felt like I was never going to get over my fear of public speaking. They all lied! I am the exception.
It wasn’t until I got a coach. It wasn’t until I learned about vulnerability, and about reconnecting with mind, body and soul.
And you know what? Earlier this year, I was a featured speaker at the Make It Happen International Women’s Day Event in Spain and I’ve delivered countless workshops both in person and on-line!
I did it! It wasn’t true at all! I CAN SPEAK IN PUBLIC! And I’m damn good too!
Put yourself first
Putting yourself first is not selfish, it’s necessary – FACT!
Why does everyone else get treated and prioritized more than you?
You’ve got to know why you’re doing anything and why you’re anywhere. Don’t believe me? Well good, ’cause Oprah said it first. Ha!
I read this post on Facebook from a friend of mine the same day that we went live with this episode.
I’m not about to take credit for it, but I wanted to share it because it was so heartfelt and relatable:
WOMAN. . . . . . . . .
When God created woman he was working late on the 6th day…….
An angel came by and asked.” Why spend so much time on her?”
The lord answered. “Have you seen all the specifications I have to meet to shape her?”
She must function on all kinds of situations,
She must be able to embrace several kids at the same time,
Have a hug that can heal anything from a bruised knee to a broken heart,
She must do all this with only two hands,”
She cures herself when sick and can work 18 hours a day”
THE ANGEL was impressed” Just two hands…..impossible!
And this is the standard model?”
The Angel came closer and touched the woman”
“But you have made her so soft, Lord”.
“She is soft”, said the Lord,
“But I have made her strong. You can’t imagine what she can endure and overcome”
“Can she think?” The Angel asked…
The Lord answered. “Not only can she think, she can reason and negotiate”
The Angel touched her cheeks….
“Lord, it seems this creation is leaking! You have put too many burdens on her”
“She is not leaking…it is a tear” The Lord corrected the Angel…
“What’s it for?” Asked the Angel….. .
The Lord said. “Tears are her way of expressing her grief, her doubts, her love, her loneliness, her suffering and her pride.”…
This made a big impression on the Angel,
“Lord, you are a genius. You thought of everything.
A woman is indeed marvelous”
Lord said.”Indeed she is.
She has strength that amazes a man.
She can handle trouble and carry heavy burdens.
She holds happiness, love, and opinions.
She smiles when she feels like screaming.
She sings when she feels like crying, cries when happy and laughs when afraid.
She fights for what she believes in.
Her love is unconditional.
Her heart is broken when a next-of-kin or a friend dies but she finds the strength to get on with life”
The Angel asked: So she is a perfect being?
The lord replied: No. She has just one drawback
“She often forgets what she is worth”.
That last part hit home for me in so many ways, because I struggled with this, and still struggle to this day only today I’m stronger and I believe in myself and love myself so much more than I ever have before.
I am unstoppable! How are you feeling?
Know your worth
Self-worth is in my mind, another way of saying self-belief or self-esteem.
You will hear me say time and time again that we are unique, and that we all have different experiences, backgrounds, etc., but everyone has the right to be happy and live a life they absolutely love.
The thing is that we can be our own worst enemy and we can let others or past experiences jade our judgment and belief system.
Know this: You are in control of your thoughts, beliefs, behaviours, values, and habits. The only thing you can’t control is circumstance and other people’s thoughts, beliefs, values, habits, etc. – that’s on them.
When you have this heightened awareness and level of certainty, you can actually reach your highest potential because you trust yourself and you love yourself enough to prioritize your needs and wants.
We may not get it right 100% of the time but that’s ok because it’s not about being perfect and it’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey…
It’s about knowing that the universe, God, something bigger than you has your back! Everything happens for you and not to you – believe this!
Look for the lessons and the signals in the struggles. Turn lemons into lemonade all the time, and FEEL every emotion because they’re all clues.
How can you make the impact you want if you don’t believe in yourself and listen to your heart? and just in case you need a reminder – I BELIEVE IN YOU! YOU ARE ENOUGH RIGHT NOW!
Work with ideal outcomes
Another way to find your courage is to work with ideal outcomes. Ideal outcomes make it a bit less scary because they’re well thought out and aligned with your values.
I guess put in another way, they are your SMART goals – specific, measurable, actionable, relevant, and timely.
When you take the time to think about ideal outcomes, you think about what obstacles are going to come up, and how you can avoid or eliminate them, or even work with them to be able to see the goal through.
You also think about ideal outcomes as they relate to your bigger goal, your bigger vision.
Visualize
Visualizing your ideal day is something both Mojca and I do with our clients to help them tap into what they really need right then and there.
When you don’t feel like you can do something, it really messes with your head. So, take a moment and visualize yourself at the end of that big presentation…
How do you feel? What do you see? What do you hear? What can you smell? Make the experience come alive for you right then and there and repeat this when you start to feel doubtful.
The more you practice this, the quicker you’ll be able to snap yourself out of negative situations or emotions, and you’ll become better at decision-making, and pretty much anything!
You have no excuse! This literally takes 5 minutes to do, and you can do it pretty much any time, any place!
I hope that this has given you some strategies that you can implement into your life and business so that you can start to achieve the results you’ve been working so hard towards very soon.
You’re in the driver’s seat. No more excuses. You got this!
xo Nat
Life Strategies with Nat for the Entrepreneurial Woman – Episode 28
Catch the replay of this week’s Facebook Live Series – Life Strategies with Nat for the Entrepreneurial Woman by clicking the link below.
